It's been quite a while since my last upload. I was so excited for Harry Potter month. But I got hit will a bought of demotivation. It's taken all my energy just to feed myself this last month. I have need to hype myself up just to cook. I haven't had the energy to write or film to make art or work on graphics for Etsy. I want to do these things but actually doing them felt as daunting as climbing Everest.
I've talked about my chronic depression in my first Mental Health and Me post and this post about getting a handle on it. The thing is it seems to come back in a full-wave just when you think you've got it under control.
For me, those waves come when I pile too much on or I get overwhelmed. But it also comes with Summer. Unlike most people's seasonal depression, mine is Summer, not Winter. The heat keeps me trapped in the AirCon. Everything is hot and sticky. The bugs are everywhere the sun is blazing. People are everywhere. It's just not my season. I'm all fall. Winter isn't bad. I love the cold. And Spring isn't too bad at first.
But Summer. I just can't. The muggy heat makes me so tired and the constant buzzing of the AirCon drives me insane. The brightness of the sun hurts my eyes and is blinding every time I go outside. but the heat. I hate being hot, you can only do so much to cool off. I can't drink tea or coffee without being uncomfortable. Hot muggy air makes me so tired.
I've spent all of July yawning and sleeping or listing to music to hype me up enough to eat. Writing this post is the first time I've touched my laptop in weeks. It didn't help that my allergies also hate summer. I've been sneezing and wheezing. My allergy pills are only helping so much. And being in constant discomfort has made the depression worse.
I've been waking up with a sore throat every morning because of my sinuses. And the sinus migraines. Physical problems only make the sleepiness worse. I'm actually yawning while writing this. I need to make a coffee and sit in front of the AirCon while I chug it.
I think I might actually be pulling out of it finally. July sucked. I'm still yawning a lot but hey I'm writing!
On a happy note, we got Salem a little sister! I'll be writing a post for her soon. She's so pretty! She's sitting next to me as I write this. She's so tiny I feel like I'll break her if I pet her too hard.
Seasonal depression has kicked my but this last month but it's time I kick back! So I'm going to jump into writing. What do you guys want to see from me? Let me know in the comments!
But seriously, Fuck Summer!
Thanks so much for reading this post! I hope you enjoyed it! Please leave a like if you did, it's much appreciated!
If you have any questions or concerns please feel free to message me or leave them in the comments below.
Photo Credit: Photo taken by me with a Canon EOS Rebel T5 with an 18-55mm lens and edited by me in Photoshop.
**This post was not sponsored**
I know exactly what you mean! My depression always seems to be worse in the Summer months.
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion, everybody faces a depression in a period of a particular season. I think that everyone has his own methods to cope with it.
ReplyDelete